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On My Favorite Color

December 5, 2012

I started this blog with multiple purposes in mind. At times I feel that my life experiences, if shared, might have a profound influence on someone in a situation similar to the ones I have been in. Sometimes I just need a place to vent my thoughts into the anonymous internets. Most personally important though is that I want to use this as a forum for my own development. I want to be able to explore myself, my issues, my opinions; to dive down within them to find their sources and paint a clearer picture of myself in the quest for personal improvement.

As the mother of a precocious young Kindergardener, I have been pestered since he was old enough to formulate an opinion on his favorite color, what mine is. “Dreen!” He has always proudly exclaimed as his response to the question (although his pronunciation as gotten better over the years), before proceeding to rattle off the favorite colors of mom, his aunties, his grandma, anyone else in the room who has told him…

What I can’t explain to my little monster is that Mommy’s default answer of “blue” is a cop-out. I don’t know what my favorite color was when I was young, although I do remember at one point insisting my walls be pained Pepto Bismol pink. I remember gravitating toward the colors of green and purple jewel tones. But blue? That was a decision, a choice. I remember realizing that I needed to have a single color as my favorite, to respond to requests. Because I understood that a vaguely nebulous list of colors I very much enjoyed would somehow not satisfy the question.

The complicated bit about why I chose blue is because I was trying to break out of the compartment I’d been forced into as the only girl, surrounded by little brothers.

I’ve never been a ribbons and lace girl. Well, okay, that’s not entirely true. But I have always been more inclined to barrel outside barefoot and lodge myself in the tallest tree available, with a book, than to spend any amount of time in the makeup mirror. Blue was a boy color. Boys got to go to karate and play baseball and do all the things my biological father offered to my brothers, but not to me.

Yay, daddy issues.

I couldn’t really tell you why I’ve stuck with blue all these years, except it has become a parroted default response. I find questions about favorites to be somewhat misleading and coerced. We act like favorites will always be the same, forgetting that as we grow and change, so do many of our preferences. This leads me now to answer a bit more honestly: I do enjoy the color blue, especially in the ocean, but my favorite color depends on the context. Roses are incredible in many colors, but tri-tone orange and Afrikan roses (red on top of the petal, white underneath) blow my mind the most. I have a soft spot for Giants’ Orange. I primarily wear silver or white gold in jewelry, but rose gold blows my mind. My wardrobe is a mix of ALL THE COLORS. Diamonds are prettiest when they sparkle and twinkle.

At the end of the day, if I had to pick my favorite color, I’d have to send people to look at the Mystic Topaz. Green, purple, blue and other jewel tones all swirled together. Gorgeous. Who says you can’t have them all?

Just don’t tell my son, we had a crazy enough adventure trying to describe aquamarine.

Until Next Time,

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